I like that - building your own community in a space you’ve created. Do you feel that the ability to create your own space comes with wisdom and experience or to do you think it is easier when we are younger and don’t think too much about consequences and judgement?
I think when you’re younger it’s instinctual. You’re not working off experience, you’re working off passion and enthusiasm. But age hopefully begets wisdom and (definite) experience to know that it’s not just about numbers, but quality of and passion within. A 1000 followers subscribed at $100 a year is $100K a year.
For me that is an odd one. Early on in life I took a different path to that lit by my parents and have a few times in my life had to stand my ground and say 'yeah, no, all of you can say that but I'm not with you, I think that is wrong' I'm not saying I'm a leader (although I tend to lead) but I definitely do not follow, and feel no need to comply with anyone to fit in. For me its about democracy in the broadest sense- that my opinion is worth no more, or less than another persons (excepting experts of course like engineers, doctors etc) I respect others and demand the same respect. The important thing for me is...I guess in a word -integrity. I rejected the cultural and religious background of my parents but that didn't leave me in a moral void - it made me think what pillars shore up the temple to atheism I want to worship in. As a teen I quickly identified what mattered to me - freedom, truth, love- it has stayed the same for life albeit with a late comer...duty. So for me, I don't give a flying f**k whether I fit into any society or sub section of society, indeed to comply with behaviours that offend me whether turning a blind eye, or avoiding confrontation would tear me to shreds. I stand or fall by my own moral code and values, alone or in a crowd.
Thank you for sharing - your words are so meaningful and make me think that the path we choose for ourselves doesn’t have to match anyone else’s expectations. We can shape our lives with the values and ideals that fit with our own integrity and this may be the most important personal value of all.
I've had this experience a lot, especially whilst growing up because I was often told that I was too 'white' to be brown because of my interests not aligning with traditional cultural interests. I used to be interested in belonging but now as an adult, I care more about being content within myself.
That’s a really difficult space to grow up in and I’m pleased to hear that you have that sense of belonging in yourself now. Is there anything in particular that helped you to find it within yourself?
Thank you! In all honesty, I think it came down to choosing what made me happy again and again until it became a habit because that’s how I started to understand myself as a person.
Being a person of color in the US often means creating your own spaces. And the people who join around you? Those are your community members.
Instinct+quality+passion is going to be a winning combo
I like that - building your own community in a space you’ve created. Do you feel that the ability to create your own space comes with wisdom and experience or to do you think it is easier when we are younger and don’t think too much about consequences and judgement?
I think when you’re younger it’s instinctual. You’re not working off experience, you’re working off passion and enthusiasm. But age hopefully begets wisdom and (definite) experience to know that it’s not just about numbers, but quality of and passion within. A 1000 followers subscribed at $100 a year is $100K a year.
For me that is an odd one. Early on in life I took a different path to that lit by my parents and have a few times in my life had to stand my ground and say 'yeah, no, all of you can say that but I'm not with you, I think that is wrong' I'm not saying I'm a leader (although I tend to lead) but I definitely do not follow, and feel no need to comply with anyone to fit in. For me its about democracy in the broadest sense- that my opinion is worth no more, or less than another persons (excepting experts of course like engineers, doctors etc) I respect others and demand the same respect. The important thing for me is...I guess in a word -integrity. I rejected the cultural and religious background of my parents but that didn't leave me in a moral void - it made me think what pillars shore up the temple to atheism I want to worship in. As a teen I quickly identified what mattered to me - freedom, truth, love- it has stayed the same for life albeit with a late comer...duty. So for me, I don't give a flying f**k whether I fit into any society or sub section of society, indeed to comply with behaviours that offend me whether turning a blind eye, or avoiding confrontation would tear me to shreds. I stand or fall by my own moral code and values, alone or in a crowd.
Thank you for sharing - your words are so meaningful and make me think that the path we choose for ourselves doesn’t have to match anyone else’s expectations. We can shape our lives with the values and ideals that fit with our own integrity and this may be the most important personal value of all.
I've had this experience a lot, especially whilst growing up because I was often told that I was too 'white' to be brown because of my interests not aligning with traditional cultural interests. I used to be interested in belonging but now as an adult, I care more about being content within myself.
That’s a really difficult space to grow up in and I’m pleased to hear that you have that sense of belonging in yourself now. Is there anything in particular that helped you to find it within yourself?
Thank you! In all honesty, I think it came down to choosing what made me happy again and again until it became a habit because that’s how I started to understand myself as a person.
That sounds like a really intentional way to live! So please to hear that it has worked for you!